Sunday, July 10, 2011
♪
omg. this is so hard D;
--
because i would give it all; to be dependent on You.
freaking only child syndrome. seeeeriously. i'm probably so dependent on telling people, talking to people... that it is probably killing me to be so silent.
the following incoherent paragraphings are deliberate. i ceremoniously apologise in advance for your eye/brain/vomitblood spasms
it's like my most un-home-domesticated dad did a crazy on me on saturday because of the clothes-storage situation in my room that I spurred up. i told him to build me an extra shelf for my in-wall cupboard and take away the extra-other cupboard in my rm so i could fit an open clothing rack. OR remove the shelves in that other cupboard and somehow drill me a hole so i can fit a pole through it for hanging space. BUT then unncessarily bought me a new cupboard that day. which, he REALLY didn't need to.
so i had to spend the whole day sitting outside reading while he fixed it up. OR helped once... by putting my foot up against the inside of the plank while he hammered from the outside. WHICH BY THE WAY, i was so afraid he was gonna drive a nail through the sole of my foot. shitsintense.
so i spent the next half hour speeding to the mall before it closed, running past starbucks... got free hangers from bed&bath, saw the boys and shoved them the hangers to hold while i ran into the mall. came back with all sorts of shit grabbed my stuff and ran
WHICH BY THE WAY i felt so bad about for the next 4hours because i barely hung around to chat with them or explain myself D; whooops.
and the whoooooooooole night rearranging all my room accumulated shit. D;
ALLLLLLLLL THIS.
and
i
could
tell
no one.
EPIC. and by the next day, by the time i actually see friends. that day's events had become too insignificant to retell. haha.
but anyways, it feels real awesome to be away from hanabi-iphonez. (shit, now i feel like re-renaming hanabi to momo. or megu. it's so much easier to scream when say; i drop it... than HAAANAABIIIIII) omg.. a.d.d yo...
but yeah. as much as i love my phone for zapping and what not, i hate it. miss the days i used to check my phone only once every hour or two. hahar. just goes to add on the list of why i have no life. aaahaha.
man, i must be like semi-cheating by letting myself blog at all. -roll eyes. but ish okay. i specifically crossed out blogging in my head when i made myself start the fast. hahah.
ZOMG anwys, i like the peace & quiet (:
but then i'm some dependent l
one
ly child so i am super emotionally dependent on other people
which means i need to interact with other people.
which also mean that other people should be physically/virtually around all the time.
so that means that i like people?
but i also like to be a loner?
which means, i like to be in a crowd.. by myself? but not ALONE?
what? what's my point? NO CLUE. hey look! shooting star! with your name...
--
who cares if I'm losing you
who cares about the anticipated bigger heartache
because right now it feels so right
i need right now.
yeah, me neither
10:23 PM
